We Are All On The Verge Of A Nervous Breakdown

So there is only one thing we can do.

Leopard Lady
4 min readFeb 15, 2022


Photo by Daria Nepriakhina on Unsplash

For some people, the year 2020 was a year of prosperity; they had made more money than they ever had made before. But, for most of us, it was one of the hardest years of our lives. The problem with 2020 is that it didn’t finish on the 31st of December, 2020. We are still living the same year for a third time now.

I don’t want to have a nervous breakdown, so I know I need to change what I expect from my life. I have decided to accept that the pandemic had a significant negative impact on my life and be grateful that, on the bright side, I didn’t lose any loved one to Covid-19.

Today, one of my best friends will call me from Miami, where she lives. We met in Canada more than a decade ago. She wants me to meet her in Spain in June. I can’t. I can’t afford it. My parents are coming in April, and they wanted to travel from England to another European Country. I can’t. I can’t afford it. Not only financially but emotionally.

When you don’t have money, you get scared of how much things that you don’t expect could potentially cost you. First, now I need travel insurance to travel around Europe because I want to make sure I am covered if I need medical assistance. Second, I don’t trust the European Governments and their changes of rules without warning, and what if I am stuck in another country and need to pay for a hotel and other costs? No, thank you. And third, I refuse to pay for a Covid test, when it should be for free, or more affordable, £100 for a test is a lot of money, sometimes more than the hotel and flights together. (And I also heard that in England, they barely look at your test, so I know it’s a mafia.)

In 2019, when my parents were here, the story was totally different. I was earning more, and I had two reliable freelance writing gigs; in total, I was making around £2,500 per month, on a bad month and some months even £3,000 or more per month. Now, I am making £1,670 every month. It’s almost £1,000 less per month, and £12,000 per year, which does make a difference in what you can afford or not. In 2019, I travelled to almost 20 countries in Europe (from which ten countries were with parents). I don’t regret doing it, but my life now is different. And I came to terms to…