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When Dating Becomes Just About Ticking A Checklist (Or Following Rules)
You will never find the perfect person, but you can find a good match.
If you are single mostly after your 20s, you probably experienced that: dating becomes all about ticking a checklist or following a checklist.
As a healthy exercise to attract the right person to you, we are told to write down a list of all the things we want our lover to be (and to have). Some people write things like I want someone caring, loving, gentle and who likes animals. Some other people write things like I want someone X tall, that makes Y money, and that has Z properties. It’s all about what is important to you.
I confess, not long before meeting my boyfriend, I wanted someone who lived alone, had a car and was 6 feet tall. He lived with his parents, had never moved out before we were living together. He just learned how to drive and bought his first car recently. And he is not tall.
He didn’t have all the things I wanted him to have, but he had all the things I needed. He is very patient, he is career-driven at the same time he wants a big family, he doesn’t make lots of money, but he is working to afford a better life for us.